Help, Help! I’m Being Repressed!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007


Well, folks, it's that time of year again. You know you have waited, longed and even pined for it all year long. It's that time of year when a chill is in the air, friends and loved-ones gather to reminisce and enjoy one another's company and time for a bunch of self-righteous wankers with an over-inflated sense of entitlement to begin the annual bitch-fest we have all come to know and love as the War on Christmas(tm).

First off, point of fact: There is NO war on Christmas. If there were I would be allowed to shoot those godamn bell-ringing pan-handlers that spontaneously burst forth into existence around around this time every year. Call it collecting for charity if it makes you feel better but it is still pan-handling. If someone you don't know comes up to you and asks for money or has a sign asking for money, that's pan-handling. The addition of a headache inducing and intensifying bell does not change that fact. The fact that they are pan-handling on behalf of another party is irrelevant. If you are going to pan-handle, at least be honest about what you are doing. The hypocrisy of it is what really gets to me. Ok, that and that fucking bell! If a homeless person were to do the exact same thing, bell or not, how long do you think it would take before they were run off? My guess is not all that long. There are ways to collect for charity without being obnoxious about it. If I want to give to your particular charity, I will find you.

(Paging Dr Tangent)

Anyway, the fact that someone says "Happy Holidays" rather than "Merry Christmas" neither constitutes a war nor repression. The fact that religious decorations are not allowed on public grounds in many towns like-wise constitutes neither war nor repression. Despite the poorly informed individuals who claim that this country was founded on "Christian values" (that is the subject for a whole nother rant all on it's own) we have a concept in the founding documents called separation of church and state that thankfully a few (a depressingly few) government agencies are beginning, finally, to acknowledge.

The moment an organized body forbids you to celebrate Christmas on your own property or express your beliefs in a public space in a way that doesn't harm or infringe on other's rights, or the government a law is passed that prohibits you from practicing your religious or spiritual beliefs then, and only then, can you claim repression. Until then, you are merely behaving like a whiny petulant douche-nozzle. Suck it up and realize that not everyone has to have the same belief system.

Now, having said all that, I do realize that most people today just too damned sensitive. The seem to be looking for a reason to feel victimized. In the same way that Christians are not being repressed when someone says "Happy holidays", they are not trying to force their religion on anyone else when they say "Merry Christmas". It also bares pointing out that wishing someone a happy Chanukkah, Yule, Kwanzaa, Shabbos, Rhammadan, Samhuinn or Christmahannukwanzica also does not constitute the forcing of one's religion on another. If someone says anything like this to you simply say thank you and accept the fact that they are merely expressing good will to another human being (an admittedly rare phenomenon). If you happen to feel good will towards the other individual go on and express that in the polite manor of your choosing, go on with your life and avoid behaving like the afore mentioned douche-nozzle.




Rant Over... for now


Bonus Trivia:
Five bonus points for the first person to name the pythons involved in the skit from which I took the title of this rant.